jessica lynn shull

becoming the woman God needs me to be

Author Archives: jessica lynn shull

boiling

I don’t want to be perpetually agitated… quick to anger, easily set off by poorly timed red lights, political posts, rearranged super market aisles, incomplete reporting, the wrong kind of ranch dressing… I want to try something different. With you.

May 26, 2019 · Leave a comment

porch swing

If I had a porch swing someone could sit with me, and in that moment we could be a blessing to each other. But I don’t need to wait for a porch swing for that. It’s my excuse. I don’t know what your porch swing is. But stop waiting for it. You are enough as you are right now.

May 5, 2019 · Leave a comment

throne

the game  it’s thrones obsessed with filling the void the empty longing for leading  they tried to rise  to demand command their right to fill it to sit in it … Continue reading

April 25, 2019 · Leave a comment

influence

You don’t get to decide what will or won’t leave an impression on someone else. You don’t get to decide what will or won’t leave an impression on you. You do get to decide whether to care. Whether to try. Whether to be better.

April 14, 2019 · Leave a comment

anthem

The concept of an anthem, a personal musical anthem, first surfaced in college. When I had to choose what song would play when I came out on stage for the … Continue reading

March 21, 2019 · Leave a comment

high five

When you’re having a no good very bad day, can you still praise someone else for a job well done? When you’re having a no good very bad week? Very bad … Continue reading

March 19, 2019 · Leave a comment

choose

I cried this weekend. I experienced envy. In envy I longed for the clarity of direction from God. In envy I wanted to be pursued to participate in something bigger … Continue reading

March 17, 2019 · Leave a comment

start slow

I chose to sit in the dark. Sometimes darkness is not a bad thing. It slows things down. In the evening after the sun sets and the sky darkens, your … Continue reading

October 26, 2018 · Leave a comment

buffering

I stepped back into my life. Parts of it. My head swells. My jaw aches. I clench when stressed. The rest of me doesn’t feel stressed though. But my teeth … Continue reading

October 10, 2018 · Leave a comment

layover

I people watch at the airport. With enough distance that I can’t hear; I can only see and I write poems, imagining their stories and their lives based on body … Continue reading

October 4, 2018 · Leave a comment

if i choose

not for work or for the store or for church or dinner or date night or plans with friends not for insta or snap not for you not for them … Continue reading

October 2, 2018 · Leave a comment

fixture

watching them watching love they’re watching they stop to observe to capture to smell to see to be if they would stop talking for a moment they would hear the … Continue reading

October 1, 2018 · Leave a comment

rare

She smiles With all of her face With all of her heart She chooses to give Something rare I see you. You matter. You are valuable. Thank you. They smile … Continue reading

September 23, 2018 · 1 Comment

the excess

walking in the sun. no trees around. we can’t pay the sky for clouds or bribe the sun to hide. around the corner a spot emerges owned by a cat. … Continue reading

September 23, 2018 · Leave a comment

a fighter

It was better because I had to fight for it. An early alarm clock though I hardly slept. A too tiny cup of hotel room coffee. Two hundred and fifteen … Continue reading

September 23, 2018 · Leave a comment

pose

Everyone wants to be a super model Orchestrated poses, scarves in the wind standing in dangerous places so the wind blows our hair just so Retakes and retakes and retakes … Continue reading

September 23, 2018 · Leave a comment

a listening hug

It was over a year ago. And it was a bad day at work. I still remember. I felt inadequate, anxious and not quite smart enough to do what was … Continue reading

January 5, 2018 · 1 Comment

your roots

Digging around the internet trying to piece together my family tree has been a scavenger hunt like no other. Deciphering handwritten census lines, attempting to translate Danish baptism records, and … Continue reading

April 29, 2017 · Leave a comment

i listened

Dear Busia, I listened to you tonight. Backing up the files on my laptop I found you and one of our conversations that I just happened to audio record several … Continue reading

April 12, 2017 · Leave a comment

Today I am thankful for… fat birds

There is a fat little bird on the railing of my deck, singing at the top of her lungs. As I watch her sitting there content, and safe and using … Continue reading

April 1, 2017 · Leave a comment

Today I am thankful for … photographs

Actual physical printed photographs. One snuck up on me today as I was cleaning and it stopped me in my path. It was an original without filters or retakes or … Continue reading

March 26, 2017 · 1 Comment

hold hands

On Saturday February 25, 2017, family and friends gathered to hold hands and celebrate the life of my amazing polish grandmother, whom many of us called Busia. I was honored … Continue reading

February 26, 2017 · 1 Comment

in spite of

This is about focus. In spite of the bad things. In spite of the loss. In spite of lost opportunities. In spite of the things that slipped through your fingers. Because in between those “in spite of” moments, were good moments too. Moments worth recalling, worth remembering and being thankful for.

January 1, 2017 · Leave a comment

clutter

Today I am thankful for… clutter My home office had devolved into a life size junk drawer. It became the destination for random pieces of paper, bills, boxes, cards, decorations, … Continue reading

August 16, 2016 · 1 Comment

blank slate

Today I am thankful for… a blank slate. I love a brand new journal. A new stack of post-it notes. A new legal pad at work. An empty word doc on … Continue reading

July 17, 2016 · Leave a comment
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